If you are looking to use Apple Pay to get cash in hand, try the following stores:
Aldi: $100 limit
Smart & Final: $50 limit
El Toro liquor store in Santa Ana, CA: $ limit TBD
Note: You will need to enter your Apple Pay PIN on your phone, then enter your debit card PIN on the store’s keypad. If the store asks for the debit card PIN, they likely offer cash back through Apple Pay.
Hi, pigs!
You know, my name is Judy and I have my own religion: Judy-ism.
Yes! Soon you will all be my personal love slaves.
But first, let’s go back in time–
Oh, Cuco!
Y’know I’m tryin’ to lead a normal life.
So, just now I was on this airplane to Europe.
It could happen.
And there’s this guy sitting next to me, looks like a squid in stretchpants.
So, y’know I’m ready to spawn!
So, this squid in stretchpants is tryin’ to make me talk to him.
Yeah, just ’cause he paid for my trip!
How much can I give?! I ask you, stud puppets.
So then, he starts puffin’ on a cigar the size of God’s ego.
And he’s blowing this cigar smoke in my petite flower face!
And I said, excuse me, excuse me, but If I wanted to shorten my life, I’d date ya!
OK, sasquatch?!
So, of course he takes this as a come on.
And he says to me, he says Judy–he says Judy–he says Judy–
He had an accordion, too!
Yes, yes, it could happen! It could happen.
And he said, “Oh, Judy! Judy!”
Yes, he wanted to possess me!
He said, “Oh, Judy, come with me to Japan! You can be my little Geisha girl.”
I said, “Oh, right! Like I have time to get my feet bound for some sperm whale with a Visa card!”
Come closer to the Goddess. Come closer!
Now I want to ask you a question.
How many of you ever started dating someone ’cause you were too lazy to commit suicide?Yeah, come on! You know what I mean?
The kinda trolls that you’ve devoted your whole lives to them and then they say, “Well, uh, I need to see other people!”
“Yeah, well watch Donahue! OK, sexy?”
And, and I have this friend, Marybeth Easy. And she’s not really my friend: She’s more like a landmass with a perm!
And, no–but, I mean it as a compliment!
You know, um, so anywho. One day she called me–you remember–she called me and she said, “Judy! Judy! Are you comin’ to my wedding?”
And I said, “Oh, yeah right!” You know, like I have time to buy her a blender just ’cause some pipefitter is poachin’ her eggs. Yeah, just ’cause some busboy from Meals on Wheels found her F-stop.
I have better things to do like stay in bed and complain.
You know what that’s like, don’t you, Princess of Power?
Look at you! Look at you! You’re begging to be me! Nhh!
By now, I’m sure you can tell that I’m the kind of woman who sits by the phone and waits for some man to call.
(spits at audience member) Crawl for it.
That’s right. Look at you, stud puppet! Look at you with your legs open like there’s almost any hope!
No, no. You cannot possess me! No. Oh!
Now, come closer to the Goddess! Come closer! Ohh!
Guess what! I want to tell you a secret!
I want to tell you a secret! Guess what!
I’m dating the Pope. No, no! I’m just using him to get to God.
That’s right, I love the Pope. He’s a fashion plate!
One time he called me–you remember–he called me. Yes and he said, “Judy! Judy!”
Yes, he wanted to possess me!
He said, “Oh, Judy! Let’s go hunting!”
And I love to hunt because I like to wear safety orange.
And, and, and the Pope says “Hey, Judy! Can I come to your house and touch your velvet painting of Elvis that cries?”
And I said, “Suffer, Pope!”
He cannot possess me. No. No!
So, then the Pope and I astral projected. It could happen.
And we went to Texas and I wrote this love song for the Pope.
It’s a country and western love song and you can dance to this. OK, sponge?
I just want a cowboy to ride me home.
I just want a cowboy who’s rich and lives in Rome.
I just want a cowboy with gold-plated soap.
I just want a cowboy named John-Paul the Pope.
No, I’m not done.
I met him one day in the crackhouse saloon. It could happen.
He lassooed a pickle from clear across the room.
He said, “Hey, little klotchky, you’re supposed to kiss my ring.”
I said, “If I wanna see your bathtub, I’ll learn how to sing.”
He’d be my main man. I’d be his blue nun.
He’d teach me how to kiss the ground. I’d teach him how to duck from a gun.
Oh hoo, I just want a cowboy to whom I can confess.
Yeah, I just want a cowboy in a long, white silky dress.
No, no! Don’t spoil me, stud puppets.
Oh, wait! Let me put down my IUD.
Some people have no concept of reality.
My mom: She made me babysit my brother, Bosco. Bosco!
Yes, he’s like you but with a human head.
No, I mean it as a turn-on, stud puppet! So!
So, um–So one day, my ma–my mom came home early and she says,
“Hey, Judy, what’s Bosco’s severed arm doing on the table?”
And I said, “Um, bad papercut.” Yeah.
One day–One day, I was comin’ home from work. It could happen.
And I noticed my house was gone.
I thought, “Oh, God. It’s my fault for leaving it out in the open!”
When I got closer, there were all these firemen.
They looked at me with lust, like you! Yes, yes!
They looked at me with lust.
And they said, “Judy! Judy! Your brother Bosco burned down the house.”
I said, “Bosco! Why’d ya torch the house?”
He goes, “It was laughin’ at me”.
I said, “Bosco! It was laughin’ with you!”
My dad used to make hot dog soup.
Yeah, he would boil the hot dogs and we get to drink the juice.
My dad, my dad! Oh, I want a guy just like my dad who worships plaid.
A guy who hikes his boxer shorts up to his neck,
sits in front of the TV set with a beer and cigarette,
and when company comes, he says [expectorates].
My dad! Oh, I want a guy just like my dad who’s really rad,
a stud who orders dentures through the mail,
makes lasagna with his feet,
and takes great pride that his eyebrows meet.
Oh, my dad! My dad!
No! I am bloated with acceptance.
You guys, you know–You know, I–I wanted to meet a sensitive guy. Didn’t I?
Huh? Yes, like you, but with a pulse.
So, I went into this punk rock bar and this guy comes up to me.
He’s got a mohawk haircut. He goes, “Hey, wanna dance?!”
I said, “No. We’ve had enough rain, Squatting Bull!” [imitates Native American chanting]
He goes, “Hey, you shouldn’t talk to me like that. When I make love I turn into an animal!”
I said, “Oh! That’s a step up!”
He says, “Come on, Judy! Let’s go out once. What do you say we go out once?”
And I said, “Well, um, to tell you the truth, I was lookin’ for someone a little closer to the top of the food chain!”
And then, you know what? You know what happened? He tried to kiss me!
No, he cannot possess me!
He tried to kiss me and he kissed like a Pez dispenser.
His head fell back 180 degrees and his tongue popped out.
Like I’m supposed to give him communion!
Thank you so much!
You people mean nothing to me!
Thank you!
Hello, everybody!
I’m excited to announce the launch of my website www.marisatech.org!
You can learn more about me and my work as an interactive multimedia developer.
If you know anyone who might be interested in hiring me, please pass the URL along.
Thanks!
Marisa
A friend of mine on social media was taking comfort in the “merciful” notion of heinous criminals spending eternity in hell. A common thought, perhaps, but is that the stance of a person who truly holds God as the Exemplar of Mercy?
Let us look to the Quran for wisdom. Every chapter of the Quran begins with the same verse, known as the Bismallah. This verse serves to identify the author. Here is a transliteration:
bi ‘sm Allah, al-ra7man al-ra7eem.
Let’s break it down.
| Arabic Transliteration | English Interpretation |
| bi | by, via, with |
| ‘sm | Name, nature |
| Allah | The definite god |
| Al-ra7man | The expresser of mercy |
| Al-ra7eem | The exemplar of mercy |
How awesome is the merciful nature of God!
What do the signs (verses) say?
[5:40] Do you not know that GOD possesses the sovereignty of the heavens and the earth? He punishes whomever He wills, and forgives whomever He wills. GOD is Omnipotent.
[15:56] [Abraham] said, “None despairs of his Lord’s mercy, except the strayers.”
[30:48] GOD is the One who sends the winds, to stir up clouds, to be spread throughout the sky in accordance with His will. He then piles the clouds up, then you see the rain coming down therefrom. When it falls on whomever He chooses from among His servants, they rejoice.
[30:49] Before it fell on them, they had resorted to despair.
[30:50] You shall appreciate GOD’s continuous mercy, and how He revives the land that has been dead. He will just as certainly resurrect the dead. He is Omnipotent.
[39:53] Proclaim: “O My servants who exceeded the limits, never despair of GOD’s mercy. For GOD forgives all sins. He is the Forgiver, Most Merciful.”
[42:28] He is the One who sends down the rain after they had despaired, and spreads His mercy. He is the only Master, Most Praiseworthy.
As we can see, when it comes to doling out mercy, there is no match to God. I find it preposterous to imagine a person arguing with God over His divine judgment!
Here is my advice to you. As you go about your life’s journey and you bear witness to gross injustices, try to remind yourself that God is the exemplar of mercy. Sometimes you may dislike a thing yet there is good in it. He knows what you know not.
In Season 2, Episode 20 of “Suddenly Susan”, Susan (Brooke Shields) recites a poem about her friend, Todd (David Strickland), who is seated front and center. In real life, the two actors were best friends until David’s tragic death at the age of 29.
The jar and the vase
They sat in the nook
The vase glanced at the jar with an arrogant look
I hold roses and lilacs and daffodils, too
What on earth could this simple receptacle do?
Then they moved the glass jar to a small windowsill
A rainbow appeared in the room it did fill
It had been in the jar
It was always inside
But the vase hadn’t noticed
Because of its pride
Then, she finally admitted
What she knew to be true
And the vase told the jar:
“I celebrate you!”
In the future, the year will be referred to as some number of years A.S.M. rather than A.D. because the world changed profoundly after Facebook opened to all users, circa 2008.
My body is constantly making predictions about everything that is going to happen in my reality, making a mental map. Then, when I go through the shift and start perceiving the new world, it throws me off balance. That is when I experience déjà vu. It always feels as though I am experiencing something that I remember experiencing before, but in the memory, I was also having déjà vu. It is a recursive experience and I take it as proof that I have successfully changed my reality.
God is like a virus that holds a healthy organism hostage and lives via the host. We say someone has “the flu” knowing full well that, while allowing for additions, deletions, and mutations, it is none other than its original form made manifest in the person. In our illness we offer God expression and relation simultaneously. Do you have The God?
Oliver Wendell Holmes wrote:
Build thee more stately mansions, O my soul,
As the swift seasons roll!
Leave thy low-vaulted past!
Let each new temple, nobler than the last,
Shut thee from heaven with a dome more vast,
Till thou at length art free,
Leaving thine outgrown shell by life’s unresting sea!
Source: http://quotes.dictionary.com/build_thee_more_stately_mansions_o_my_soul#bbWw4iiAVIR39t6K.99
The mansions are the organisms.
Consciousness keeps experiencing. We as living beings grow and change individually and as a whole.
The experiences never run out and every one important to The All.
The oneness of God is the alone-ness of God.
We exist so we can have “one and other”.
God created us so we could belong to a relationship
even closer than sister and brother.
blissonature 